So much for diligence

I think since I wrote it down, somehow I've been worse at being diligent. I wish I were better, but this is just not the case. I guess now I'm being more diligent than I was before at writing on this blog because I am doing it, but you can see that the frequency since my last post was worse rather than better, and the goals that I had, I did not achieve. I also felt bad about not achieving my goals. In fact, I've always had this problem with goals. I don't achieve them and it makes me feel worse. The theory behind goals is that you strive for them, reach them and feel good. The problem I have is that I start to strive, but don't continue in it after I realize just how hard it is and then I feel worse about the whole thing. Maybe I should just take any goal I have and lower the bar a little to make it achievable? Here's a goal. To wake up before noon almost every day. Yeah, I accomplished that goal! Do I feel better? Not really. I know that there are a billion things I should be doing better to live a healthier, more spiritual, more balanced life. I guess I should just choose one and work on it for a while, instead of 15 or so that I try to do at once. Ok, there's a new goal, to make more modular and specific goals. Be more diligent is so encompassing that I couldn't reach it. I'll choose some sub-goal and work on that.